Day 164 - Hungry... for God

The Papa prayer – 1

I’m still hungry – as a matter of fact – more hungry than before I began. The introduction and first chapter of Crabb’s book on prayer repeatedly describes the book as a personal narrative, but I am disappointed to not read a single scripture yet.

He asks 9 questions that he answered yes to – all relating to ‘feeling’ or lack thereof after praying – and often after not receiving answers to prayer. One, ironically almost describes the “feeling” I have after beginning his book: he asks if one has ever prayed and then felt empty…

I’m certain there are greater depths of prayer than I have known. Yet, I do see God as a more intimate friend than any of the world I’ve been privileged to count as dear sisters and brothers in the Lord. I have experienced miraculous answers to prayer, and I have experienced peace that God is in control of a situation even though I do not see the ‘escape’. Reviewing God’s character through His names inspires me to worship, remembering what God has done through Bible days and my own days, inspires me to praise, and reading of His love and intent for me as His child, permits me to request. All of my past prayer experiences have building blocks of scripture.

True it’s only the introduction, the first chapter and part of the second, but I’m wondering when I will get to something of God in Crabb’s story that will inspire me to pray, close the book, disappointed for today, and turn back to my study on fasting which ironically enlightens a quote from Mr. Crabb.

Inspiration today is from two passages: John 16:22-23, where Jesus is speaking to his followers, predicting his death and resurrection. “You too now have sorrow; but I will see you again and your heart will rejoice, and no one takes your joy away from you…”and Luke 5:35 “But the days will come; and when the bridegroom is taken away from them, then they will fast in those days.”

After the resurrection (now) and until Christ returns He says my heart WILL rejoice and no one can TAKE AWAY that joy from me. I can, however, ignore it, deny it, or leave it lying unused in the clutter of life’s cares. I cannot experience that joy (but will experience the lack of it) if I depend on how I FEEL instead of depending on the truth of God’s Word. It is obvious to me that the joy we all long for is not mentioned as a result of what was asked for but from Christ’s presence alone, for Jesus says – “I WILL see you again, and your heart WILL rejoice.” The passage in Luke also indicates that until the Lord returns, there will be fasting.” Fasting to me is refraining from that which would claim or deceive me to believe it can fulfill me as only the joy of Christ’s presence, or any of the fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control)

That is one thing that does concur from Crabb’s narrative when he shared how he finally discovered that the complete happiness he sought could only be received from God, and to receive that he had to “give up on the happiness he [thought he could] find elsewhere.” He rightly concludes "To not ask [of things] “to fill me up more than they can.”

Things were not created with the capability to provide that which only our Saviour can. John Piper called experiencing the presence of God “Indestructible Joy”. Conversely, created things will rot, burn, degrade, and disintegrate. They are not eternal. No temporal thing can provide the spiritual ‘side-effects’ we crave.

Now I conclude I found a nugget in Crabb’s book after all – I just hope the Word will more clearly be shared as he expands on the rest of His personal prayer experience. Without it, it is like eating the spices that enhance the meat, without the meat.

Today's Smoothie: Bananna - with Watkin's coconut and bananna flavor added

Vegetable Soup - Tomato & Vegetable broth, celery, carrots, onion and garlic topped with Swiss Chard (very yummy - hope Ken leaves me some for tomorrow!)

Tuna in celery - topped with cranberries.    A good day, but I need to drink more liquid.